The Everyday Trainer Podcast

5 things you're probably doing wrong with your dog

Meghan Dougherty

As a trainer with over 6 years of experience working with owners here are the 5 things I see that are causing behavioral issues in our dogs. From excessive affection to letting your dog pull you up to other dogs, try to avoid these things to prevent problems. Trust me, I'm a trainer. As always, grab yourself a tasty drink and enjoy.

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Speaker 1:

Hello, hello and welcome back to the Everyday Trainer podcast. My name is Meg and I am a dog trainer. Today we're talking five things that you might be doing with your dog that's causing you problems and behavioral issues. This is a good one. We're going to talk about all the things that I see with my owners, what I walk them through and what you might be doing as well. So you know the drill Grab yourself a tasty drink and meet me back here. Welcome back y'all. So happy you're here.

Speaker 1:

I am recording this episode from the inside of my van. I wish you could see my setup. It's kind of. I have a cup of coffee in my lap, I've got my podcast like dashboard thing set up on my lap as well, and then my phone with my notes pulled up on my knee. So we're very professional over here. I'm recording this in the morning, so tasty drink of choice is, of course, coffee.

Speaker 1:

I got a lot of feedback from the previous episode. Obviously it's a more intense episode and you know just kind of who I am. I tend to like laugh it off, like when something's really serious or like traumatizing. That's kind of just my go-to response. I don't know why. I've always been like that, like when I'm uncomfortable, I just like laugh. So you know, I got a few messages from people that were like oh my God, that was incredibly traumatizing, like I can't believe you're so lighthearted about it. But that's just kind of how I am and how I handle things for myself. So this episode is a little bit lighter.

Speaker 1:

We're kind of getting into, you know, things that are really common I see as a dog trainer, and things that I wish I could kind of shout from the rooftop of like hey, don't do this, because it's causing problems. And if you just have one dog you don't really see it. You know, because it happens over time and it's slow. But as somebody who works with like so many dogs every month and so many owners every month, it gets. It gets a little bit frustrating because I'm doing the same thing all the time and I'm training dogs on the same thing all the time and I'm training owners on the same thing all the time, and so it it can get a little bit frustrating because you're like man, like I wish that everybody knew this so that they didn't have to, you know, hire a trainer and do behavioral mod and work through all of these behavioral issues. So this is just kind of my like shout out into the world of like, hey, here's what I'm seeing in the dog industry, here's what I'm seeing with my owners, here's some very simple things that we can do to prevent, you know, big problems from developing down the line.

Speaker 1:

This also kind of plays into the culture of dog ownership. I've noticed a nice little shift, probably over the past year or so. I'm seeing a lot more like really dedicated owners who are like doing all the things, and I love that. I love that people are doing their research now and getting dogs and putting in the time to train them. So I love that. And this isn't to like bash you at all, but what I am seeing, you know and have seen over my career, is these trends that constantly pop up and lead to behavioral issues in our dogs. So let's just go ahead and dive right into them. The first one I have is petting your dog 24-7.

Speaker 1:

So many owners the majority of their relationship revolves around affection, whether that's, you know, petting your dog or giving them treats, or telling them that they're the most perfect angels in the whole world. Even though they drag you down the street and jump up on you, people like it. They're like I love my dog, my dog can do no wrong. I'm going to pet them 24 seven, and essentially what this does is it creates really insecure dogs. Now, one thing that I'm really happy with in how I was raised is that my parents raised me to be very confident and to problem solve. I you know they weren't mean by any means, but I definitely was not coddled and because of that I think you know it's made me like a very successful, like well functioning, well rounded person, and so that's what I hope to see for my dogs and my owner's dogs.

Speaker 1:

So so many people are coddling their dogs. Their whole relationship revolves around them coddling their dogs. They never ask their dogs to do anything. All they do is come home, give their dogs immediate affection. Every time they're like sitting on the couch and the dog walks up, they're petting the dog, and I'm obviously not against giving your dog affection at all. I have golden retrievers. I cuddle them all the time. They're the cutest things in the whole world and I smush their little faces and I'll literally carry them around, even though they're like 70 pounds. I'll pick them up and carry them. I love them. But the whole foundation of our relationship isn't affection we have just like this, I don't know. It's almost kind of like friendship. Like I can walk into a room and they're like, hey, and I'm like, hey, what's up? If I don't pet them immediately, they're not having like a mental breakdown.

Speaker 1:

I have a dog here right now and he cannot function if you're not like physically touching him and if you're not looking at him and if you're not telling him that he's a good boy all the time, like he literally just whines and cries and shakes and cannot function without constant attention. And what's so silly is when owners drop off their dogs, I typically get like, oh, he's really good, but here's what we're struggling with. Or you know, here's what I want to work on with him, or whatever. When the owner dropped him off, he was like he's really good, like he's pretty much trained, and I was like, oh, sweet, and he knew all the things. Like the owner knew all the things he knew you know the structured walks and thresholds and all that. And I amazing, like this is going to be so great.

Speaker 1:

However, even though that dog was trained on all the things you know all the dog trainer things, the thresholds and the structured walk like I can tell that this owner's life revolves around this dog. Not that that's like a bad thing, but it's created this really, really insecure dog that when I put him in the crate or when I put him on place like he loses it. So my goal is to have a dog that can do both, a dog that can hang out on the couch with us and get cuddles and, you know, chill and relax, and that we can pet. That's obviously why we get dogs is for that companionship but can also go into the crate and I can take a shower or like leave my house and the dog's comfortable and confident and okay, even if I'm not immediately like touching the dog or in the same room. So so many owners are creating these like anxiously dependent dogs and that's just not really what I want to see in a dog. I want a dog that's confident, whether I'm in the room or not. They're confident in their abilities, they can think for themselves and they can just be like functioning dogs.

Speaker 1:

It's not fair for your dog to be in this constant anxious state every time you leave because, guess what, you're going to have to leave at some point, you're going to have to shower. I had another, you know, phone call recently with an owner with a puppy and she's not crate training. She said I tried, the puppy cried all night and then we gave up after day one and I was like, okay, well, what are you doing when you like have to leave the house? And she's like, well, I don't, I just don't leave. And I was like, okay, what about, like when you shower? Like what are you doing? And she's like, well, that's really why I'm calling you is because I want to be able to like shower and put my puppy in the crate without her like losing her mind. And so people just feel guilty for leaving their dogs in any sense and everybody wants to be able to take their dog everywhere, which I think is great.

Speaker 1:

I obviously love taking my dogs. I traveled across the country with them, you know, for a couple months and they went everywhere with me. But also they can just hang out in their crates and be comfortable and totally fine. So it's all about balance. We want to teach our dogs both Like yes, I do like to train dogs with social neutrality, like how we would train a service dog, like I want them to be neutral to pretty much anywhere, anywhere where we would take them if we're going to a coffee shop or you know wherever farmer's market. But they also need to be able to go into the crate and hang out in the crate and know that, ok, they're going to come back. They always come back like the crate's fine, the crate is my place, like it's my go to spot to go, and as a dog trainer I emphasize crate training so much because that's the part that people struggle with.

Speaker 1:

People have no issues taking their dogs everywhere. People love to do that. People have no issues with like active training. That's why I talk so much about crate training and place and structured walks. It's because it's that boring stuff that like it's not fun, it's not flashy. Like it's not fun, it's not flashy Like so much of what I do with the dogs is teaching them to do nothing and teaching them that like just because I'm in the room doesn't mean I'm going to touch you, doesn't mean I'm going to come and let you out. Like that is the biggest struggle.

Speaker 1:

I walked into my house this morning and you know I've been just give you guys a kind of inside of what I've been doing recently. I've been sleeping in my van in the driveway because I like I don't know having this like mental separation of the house's work, I like wake up in the morning and I like walk into work, like it helps a lot, especially with like burnout. And I think if I had like a different setup with board and trains, like maybe if they were in like not the main house, but how my house is set up is, it's like my master bedroom I converted into the dog room because I have that sliding door that goes out to the back door and so my bedroom is on the other side of the house. But I have just like a regular Florida house, like it's very small, it's one level, it's all tile, so like that shit echoes. So if a dog is just like shuffling around in a crate, like I'm up and basically I was sleeping in the house and I just like was not sleeping well enough and then I was losing my mind and I was like all right, this isn't great and if you know me, you know that I love sleeping in my van anyways.

Speaker 1:

So when I wake up in the morning, I walk into the house and immediately the dogs hear me and they go absolutely ballistic, right, because they're like oh my gosh, she's here. She's going to come and let us out. I'm not going to let the dogs out until they settle, because so much of what my owners do is like they wake up and they're like oh my God. And so the dog thinks like, oh, as soon as there's movement in the house, like it's all about me, like it's all about me and they don't have to go potty right away, ok, that's like. Another big thing that people will come for me about is they're like well, they're screaming because they need to go potty. They don't need to go potty. We do our last potty break around 10 or 11.

Speaker 1:

I wake up between six and seven, like they are literally fine, unless I have a puppy. Then we do like a midnight potty or whatever like throughout the night. You know, if the puppy's like super young and they can't hold it that long, I do have a puppy right now who's sleeping through the night and is doing great. But essentially I'm going to walk into that room and I'm not going to start letting dogs out until they're settled. Like you cannot just like demand my attention and me just like cater, oh my gosh. Yes, I'm going to immediately come to you and this is what our owners are doing and if you don't have behavioral issues, fine.

Speaker 1:

But if you're struggling with behavioral issues and you're saying, megan, my dog drags me down the street and jumps up on gas and barks at other dogs and it's like, yeah, because your dog is making the decisions all day long, they're saying I want to be pet now. So they walk up to you and you pet them. They're saying I want to be let out now. So they throw a little fit in the crate and then you go and let them out. They, you know, push you around for affection and all of these little things, and so of course they're going to push you around on the walk or when guests come over. Like of course they're not going to listen to you because that's not the foundation of your relationship.

Speaker 1:

The whole foundation of your relationship has basically been that dog demands affection and demands attention and you give it to them every single time. So I want you to start being mindful of do I pet my dog every single time they come up to me. My dogs will do this with other people, like they've learned that that doesn't work with me. But if there's people in the house, they're like we're cute and we're adorable and we can be super pushy for affection and guess what it usually works. People are normally like, oh my gosh, they're so cute, like I'm going to pet them and I'm like, whatever you can like, let my dogs bully you, but the relationship that I have with them is they're not going to come up to me and like be super pushy all the time because they know that I'm not going to pet them every single time. They're pushy Sometimes, yes, I will, but we have a relationship where they listen and respect me and so we have those healthy boundaries around affection. They know that I'm not just always going to be there and pet them every time they demand it. Or, you know, go and let them out every time they whine my dogs do not whine, just so we know my dogs do not whine in the crate. Well, millie yeah, millie definitely barks, but she's still young and you know I don't let her out, so I don't really know why she does that. But Minka, zoe, lucy, if I put them in crates, they chill and that's fine. That's what I want. That's what I want for my owners and their dogs. So the reason why I talk about, you know, like setting boundaries around affection is not because I don't want you and your dog to live a happy life. It's because I want your dog to be confident and secure, even when you're not directly touching them.

Speaker 1:

Another thing to kind of touch on with this is when our dogs are stressed and anxious, what do we do? We immediately run over to them and we're like, it's okay, it's okay and we start petting them. So in dog world we're kind of rewarding and reinforcing that. So your baby talk and your affection is a reward. We're reinforcing that state of mind. So if your dog is being super anxious or amped up and bitey and we're going, hey, it's okay, it's okay, we're just rewarding that. And getting into the world of like dog sports has really kind of taught me that. Because when the dog is like on a bite, like I do um, I've done IGP stuff with Minka so when she's on a bite, good, good girl, and we're petting her head and, you know, rewarding her for biting so when your dog's being a brat and you're like, hey, it's okay, calm down, calm down, you're just rewarding them for that like state of mind and that's not what we want. So always act how you want your dog to act. If you don't want your dog to be like you know, anxious mess, then you have to take a deep breath.

Speaker 1:

Last night I was doing a session with one of my clients and we're going over e-collar and part of what I do for conditioning e-collar is I layer it over the place command. So the dog that I'm training is around six months old but has really started to bite the owners Like is neat, they need some way to tell the dog. No, like this dog is just getting like way out of hand. It's a like I don't even know what this dog is. It's kind of like a working line lab but like really small, so maybe like a working line lab, but like really small, so maybe like a working line lab with like a terrier, like she's literally like 20 pounds, like super tiny um, and so we're layering over e-collar into our training and the dog's getting really frustrated, not so much from the e-collar but because we're holding her to place.

Speaker 1:

We've never really held her to place before and so even just holding her to place, we've never really held her to place before, and so even just holding her with the leash she was like biting at my hands and like just really really like going through it like so, so frustrated that I was not allowing her to get up off of place and I was holding her to a down because she's never been held accountable in that way before. So she started biting my hand and I gave her a muzzle correction and the owner was like like immediately reached down for her to, like you know, tell her that it's okay. And even when she was like getting really fussy, she was like it's okay, just you, just, you know, lay down, like giving this, like baby talking, and in those moments, like if we, if we have a dog, that's like throwing a temper tantrum because they don't want to do something and they're like biting at us and we're trying to like coddle them and keep them from doing that. We're literally just reinforcing it. And it's important to tweak how we look at dogs. They are not people. Just because, like you know, a kid's having an anxiety attack like, yes, we're going to be, like, hey, it's okay, like I'm here. You know, it's not the same with dogs. Like dogs are very physical and we're trying to communicate with them like they're human babies and it's creating these like really problematic dogs. So in those moments, just be as calm as possible, but don't give in to.

Speaker 1:

You know the dog throwing a temper tantrum, other dog pushing you for affection, like we don't want to add affection and baby talk and like that whininess into those situations. It's your job to lead by example. You need to act how you want your dog to act. That doesn't mean, you know, coddling them and giving them that whiny voice. Our dogs don't really understand language. They're mostly relying on our tone of voice. So when we're like, oh, it's okay, it's okay, we're literally just whining at them. Do you want your dog to be whining in that moment? Then don't. Then don't make any noise, don't give them affection. Wait until they're offering you a behavior or a state of mind that you like and then we can reward that with affection. So our next one I see this one literally all the time. It's very specific but it causes a lot of problems Allowing your dog to pull up to other dogs on leash.

Speaker 1:

Pull up two other dogs on leash. I wish I could shout this one from the rooftops, but I saw this one just yesterday. I'm doing a lesson walking a dog around a neighborhood. A woman walks up to us with a little doodle on a harness. This doodle is on its hind legs. This woman is basically skiing behind this dog and she's pulling up to us my owner is wonderful. And she looks up at the owner and she says, hey, he, my dog can't say hi, he's in training. And I was like, oh my God, I'm going to cry. That was beautiful, did exactly what she needed to do. And then we keep walking and we see this woman pull her dog up to another doodle. So now both doodles are tight at the end of the leash, on harnesses, pulling towards each other to go and greet each other.

Speaker 1:

Now let's say these dogs are friendly, which they were. Those dogs get close, they start barking, they're getting frustrated. Right, we're doing a dragon. That's literally what we do in bite work. The dog drags you into the bite. So the dog's dragging you into something really rewarding. What does this reinforce? One it teaches the dog that every single time you see another dog, you better get pumped up Like start dragging me in because we're about to go say hi to that dog. It doesn't matter if your dog is friendly or not. This is how.

Speaker 1:

99 percent no, I'll say half half of reactivity cases that I get are from dogs greeting other dogs on the walk, on the leash, they're allowed to pull the owner to another dog and go and play with that dog. If your dog is friendly and likes playing with other dogs, there is nothing more reinforcing and rewarding than playing with another dog. It's so much fun for them Like you are never going to be as fun as playing with another dog. It's so much fun for them Like you are never going to be as fun as playing with another dog. So what happens? We're walking, our dog sees another dog. They go oh my God, I need to go see that dog. The leash is holding them back. We're restraining them in some way. So what's that dog going to do? They're going to get frustrated and they're going to start barking. So they're going to start barking, they're going to go up on their hind legs and they're going to start pulling. Then we allow our dogs to go over to the other dog, which is the reward. So essentially, what we've just done is we've rewarded our dogs for pulling us and for barking.

Speaker 1:

So when I get dogs that are reactive because they're overexcited, this is typically how this happens is we allow our dogs to say hi to every dog. We allow our you know strangers to come up and say hi to our dogs and it creates this dog that gets so jacked up every time they see another dog, instead of being neutral. Everything that I do with dogs is about neutrality. I want the dogs to see another dog and then check in with me, see another person and check in with me, because what happens is it starts off as like, oh, my dog's just excited, but that excitement can turn to anxiety and frustration very quickly and then you have a dog who is, you know, being reactive to other dogs, even when you're not on leash, or that you know excitement turns to like frustration and maybe even a little bit of aggression. I would say half of the reactivity cases that I get start with just an overexcited, over-friendly dog, not to mention the risk of your dog getting into a fight with that other dog like nose to nose.

Speaker 1:

Greetings like that, on leash, with tension, is not how our dogs should be greeting. There should be no tension in the leash, because how dogs greet is they sniff each other's butts and then they go and sniff each other's like noses or faces, and so we completely cut out the first half of that greeting interaction for our dogs when we allow them to pull up to other dogs. We're doing tension in the leash, nose to nose. If there's going to be a dog fight it's going to be in those moments. So you just don't know the other dog. We're reinforcing things that we don't want our dogs to do, which is pulling on the leash and, you know, getting overly excited when they see other dogs.

Speaker 1:

Most dogs that I train do not need help getting excited, they need help slowing down and calming down. That's what everybody comes to me for. They want a dog that's calm and neutral, that they can take everywhere. They want to go to a coffee shop and put their dog in a down and have you know him, just hang out and chill without reacting to every single dog that comes by. So if your dog has had a lot of experience you know greeting other other dogs on leash you just have to get a ton of reps not greeting other dogs, so seeing a dog and not being allowed to greet them. If they've had a billion interactions where they do get to greet the dog, then you need a billion interactions where they don't. We have to kind of balance the scales a little bit in that direction and teach them that not every interaction is going to lead to you playing with another dog, not to mention I trust my ability to read my dog.

Speaker 1:

But a lot of people don't know how to like read the signs of conflict approaching. And I know this because when I talk with owners and they have an incident where you know the dog got attacked or attacked you know somebody else's dog they're like it came out of nowhere. Well, I can tell you it never comes out of nowhere. You're just missing the signs. Or we're seeing a tail wag as excitement and wants to play, instead of a sign of like, focus or aggression, which that can definitely be. So don't allow your dog to pull up towards other dogs. We want to teach our dogs to be neutral and we want to reward our dogs for checking in with us instead of engaging with other dogs. That's a big one. I see that all the time. All right.

Speaker 1:

Next, and this kind of plays into that, last one Going to dog parks and doggy daycares. I will die on this hill. I get attacked online all the time for saying this, but it's just not a great place. But it's just not a great place. Like as a trainer, I talk to so many people that have one bad experience at a dog park or one bad experience at a daycare and their dog now has like pretty severe aggression towards other dogs or reactivity towards other dogs, activity towards other dogs. That's the thing is, it literally only takes one bad experience to shape your dog's perception of other dogs. So it's not so much your dog, it's other people's dogs and it's the fact that like people aren't managing their dogs.

Speaker 1:

So, for example, I'm very like social with my dogs and the dogs that I you know have come for training, which I've kind of realized like not a lot of trainers do it. You know who does a really good job of like socializing their training dogs is Keely from Rough Rules. She was on one of my previous episodes. She does a great job of like structured social time with the dogs. She does a great job of like structured social time with the dogs. But essentially why this works is because she has full control over the dogs. Like they look to her and they respect her and if they don't, they don't get to go out with the other dogs, whereas with a dog park setting you only have control over your dog. You don't have control over anybody else's dogs. So if you know a dog, to come up into my dog space and like push them around. And I know how to read dog body language. So if I walked into a dog park like I would be fine.

Speaker 1:

But it's not that. It's like the people that are sitting on the bench on their phone while their dog is just like running around, like terrorizing other dogs, or the people who are like, oh well, my dog's attacked like five dogs, but we still go to the dog park. I've had a conversation with multiple people on the phone about that, about like, oh yeah, this is our fifth incident of my dog attacking a dog at a dog park. And I'm like, please, for the love of God, stop going to the dog park, but my dog loves it so much. I'm like it's so unfair, it's so unfair to these other dogs that you're just like like I'm going to get a phone call from those owners about like, oh, my dog got attacked by a dog at a dog park and now we have to do training because now it's like scared and reactive with other dogs. It's like I'm worried about those people, those people who just continually bring their dogs to the dog park even though they've attacked other dogs. They hump other dogs, they're just like incredibly rude with other dogs.

Speaker 1:

My last dog park interaction was at a dog park in Tampa and it was so fucking horrible but I wanted to take my dogs to the beach. So bad and like my dogs are like I have four well, I have five, four that could go to a dog park. I didn't have Gretchen with me at the time. She stayed at home, so Millie, minka, lucy and Zoe brought them to the dog park. I'm just hanging out in the water with them. They're just swimming around having a great time playing with each other. Like they don't really care for interacting with other dogs, especially because, like I, constantly have new dogs in our house, so they're always they're just like unfazed by it.

Speaker 1:

And who comes in a doodle just a big pushy doodle, just like pushes into the dog park. The owners are just kind of like walking around their dog, beelines to us and is being so pushy and so dominant, keeps trying to hump Minka. Minka is like a soft little baby and like will never like correct another dog, so she's just like literally drowning while this doodle is trying to hump her. I grab the doodle by the scruff, I pull him off. The doodle comes back. I grab the doodle by the scruff. I pull him off. The doodle comes back. I grab the doodle by the scruff, pull him off. He starts trying to hump Millie. He's being super pushy, like jumping all over me, jumping all over my dogs, and I'm standing in the water, like far away from everybody, and I'm like where the fuck is this owner Like for real? Where the fuck is this owner? I look across.

Speaker 1:

They're like way on the other side of the dog park, like nowhere near their dog, literally watching me, like watching me try to pull their dog off of me, pull the dog off of my dogs, right. And I'm like, okay, this obviously like is not working. So we move to the other side. The doodle follows us. It's still being super pushy. I walk over to the people and I'm like, hey, can you grab your dog? They lose it. They are like you need to stop touching our dog, like just going off on me, and I'm like, all right, this is not worth it, like I'm not trying to get into it with these random freaking people, and so they're like not really yelling at me, but they're being like, well, you shouldn't bring your dogs in here if they don't get along with other dogs. And I'm like it's not that my dogs don't get along with other dogs, is that like they don't want to be humped in the face by your like socially inept doodle? I'm sorry but whatever. So I ended up leaving.

Speaker 1:

I like put my dogs in the little like hose off area and the doodle of course like beelines for another dog and starts like chasing the other dogs around and like just being a holy terror. There's another guy in the dog park and he's like also leaving right, he's like I don't want to deal with this, so he's like waiting for me to finish hosing off my dogs and starts kind of talking to me and he was like yeah, like your dogs seem really cool and blah, blah, blah, just kind of like acknowledging like hey, that dog sucks and this sucks, that like we all have to basically clear out the dog park because this one person thinks that it's cute that their doodle is just being like so pushy with everybody else's dogs and like these people don't want to like control their dog at all. Not only that, but he was like running across like everybody's towels and like everybody's stuff and it was just like shocking that people think that that's cute and like allow their dog to do that. So that's my last dog park interaction. And then another thing that I commonly do is take dogs outside of the dog park.

Speaker 1:

I go to the Baldwin Park Dog Park because it's truly like doggy fight club. It's also on the water, which is nice, and it's really big. There's a lot of space. So I love that. But again, there's those dogs every now and again that the owners just don't have any control over and they think that it's cute that their dog is, like you know, jumping up on all of these other dogs or like stealing a dog's ball and all of this stuff that it. It just makes it like unenjoyable for everybody and it also teaches your dog that, like, other dogs are rude and they're going to be pushy with you and you better learn how to like rude and they're going to be pushy with you and you better learn how to like guard your space. So if that dog comes up to you and you growl like that's how we keep that dog away. So then we're just reinforcing like it's fend for yourself, lord of the flies. Y'all like better, you know, brush up on your defense skills, because I'm not gonna to advocate for you.

Speaker 1:

So if you do bring your dog to a dog park, advocate for them. Do not allow other dogs to just like rush up and you know, like get into their space. And another thing, too, is like if your dog doesn't look like they like the dog park, they probably don't. One of my clients his dog was like rushed by a dog at a dog park and then he became aggressive, like pretty forwardly aggressive, and he was like, yeah, every time I would take in the dog park, he would just sit next to me and I'm like, yeah, he hates it, like he doesn't want to be there. He doesn't like all that social pressure, like stop taking him there. And it's just our mindset of like oh, I want my dog to be friends with other dogs and like get along with other dogs, so that's what I'm going to force on them, whereas what we really need to do is advocate for our dogs and show them like just because another dog is coming up to you doesn't mean that like I'm going to allow that dog into your space. I'm going to advocate for you, I'm going to fight for your space, like you've shown me that it makes you uncomfortable when dogs or people come up into your space. So don't worry, I'm not going to allow that. Tell people, hey, sorry, we're training. You know, my dog can't say hi to other dogs. You can also say, like my dog's not friendly, which I used the other day. I had a board and train. This guy was like, oh my gosh, so cute, started reaching down, put his hands in this dog's face and I said, hey, he's not friendly. And he was like, oh, are you sure? And I was like, yeah, I'm sure. Like this dog wanted nothing to do with that social interaction. So don't be afraid to advocate for your dog's space and avoid those dog parks.

Speaker 1:

The next big thing is daycares. I understand, like the need for doggy daycare. We're gone all day. We want to entertain our dogs. We don't want them to just be like sitting at the house alone. In our, you know, owner minds, that's like the worst thing ever. Now, not all dog care. Dog daycares are the same. Cares are the same. This is a like blanket statement. Obviously there's good ones out there. Most of them are not. Most of them are just there to make money. Their goal is to get as many dogs as they can. It's essentially a giant open room and they just throw a bunch of dogs in.

Speaker 1:

I have spoken with so many people probably at least 100 people who used to work at dog daycares, and it's literally doggy fight club. So when you get a little report that says, oh, your dog did amazing today, guess what they want you to come back. They're not going to tell you that, like a dog was like humping your dog, or that, like they got into a little scuffle, or your dog like sits in the corner and doesn't even like to be there. Like they're there to get you to bring your dog back, so they're going to make it seem like the most wonderful little thing ever. And they're going to tell you that like, oh, your dog had so much fun today and they loved it. Had so much fun today and they loved it.

Speaker 1:

Um, most dogs do not love doggy daycare. It is super, super stressful for them. Uh, they are incredibly anxious and we often mistake. Uh, anxious for excitement. We're like, oh, the dog's excited to go, whereas they're just super jacked up and super anxious. And, as a dog trainer, a majority of you do not need help getting your dog super jacked up and super anxious and, as a dog trainer, a majority of you do not need help getting your dog more jacked up. You need help slowing your dog down and calming your dog down and teaching your dog to be neutral around other dogs, which is the exact opposite of what happens at doggy daycare. Now, the other big thing is one your dog is most likely in an incredibly unnatural environment.

Speaker 1:

Personally, I love pack walks for dogs because a few things were out in nature there's tons of space and we're moving. It's important that the dogs have a task to do. To just like put them in a sterile room inside a building with like fluorescent lights, with all of these like anxious, untrained dogs, is absurd to me. It's literally doggy fight club. I can't believe that it's like allowed to operate like that. If you want your dog to have social interactions, like find somebody that does pack walks with dogs. Like get the dogs moving. There's so much less like social pressure if the dogs are doing something, if they're all moving forward in one direction and if there's one person leading them, or you know a couple of people leading them, like the dogs are going to follow the lead of the people.

Speaker 1:

In a doggy daycare setting, those employees are like high schoolers, like they don't understand dog behavior. They don't understand dog body language. They're literally just there to break up fights and clean up poop, like I'm sorry, but that's all that is. So you drop your dog off in the morning. They go into the big doggy playroom for however long. If you're lucky, you go to a daycare that like separates your dog for some portion. Lucky you go to a daycare that like separates your dog for some portion, some portion of the day, but most of them don't like. Most of them, the dog is just like out.

Speaker 1:

I cannot imagine, like as somebody who has a lot of dogs at my house and like I do do social time with the dogs in the yard. That does not last very long because the dogs get overstimulated. As the dogs start to get overstimulated in my yard, I take them back inside, one at a time. When the dog stopped listening to me, you go back inside. When you show me that you can't handle this anymore, you go back inside. We're not going to do this anymore. So if your dog is like super anxious and at a doggy daycare like all day long, of course they're going to go home and sleep. They just went through battle. Like for the people that are like well, my dog loves it. Like he gets so tired. He comes home and just like sleeps all day. It's like, yeah, because that was a super stressful situation for them.

Speaker 1:

Like I would personally love to have like a structured daycare, you know where we do like hikes and training sessions with the dog and practice place and crate time, and I'm sure there are those places out there. But the fact of the matter is a majority of them aren't like that. A majority of them are essentially, you know, a giant room full of a bunch of untrained dogs and I promise you you don't want to put your dog in that sort of situation. All right, next thing thing and this kind of gets into like the training a little bit never telling your dog no in a meaningful way. This is the biggest thing and this is why I talk about correcting dogs so much. It's not because I'm like, ah, you know, correct the dog left and right, it's because owners are really good at teaching their dogs what to do but they're not very good at telling their dogs no. We feel, feel really bad when we tell our dogs no. We never want anything to be uncomfortable.

Speaker 1:

A good example of this is I was doing a lesson yesterday with one of my clients who has a massive dog massive, really, really big, and this owner is super awesome, she's open to everything. But we started the dog with doing our walking drills on a slip lead and this dog is just too big. He's open to everything. But we started the dog with doing our walking drills on a slip lead and this dog is just too big, he's willing to put so much pressure on a slip lead. So I was like all right, let's move to a prong collar. So I brought the prong collar over yesterday and you know, we're doing our walking drills. The dog starts to put some pressure on the leash. So I start to move backwards, the pressure on the prong collar increases. The dog's never felt the prong collar before. So we get a little and the dog starts moving towards me, gets back into the heel position. She was pretty good. She wasn't like freaking out or anything.

Speaker 1:

But the owner was like, why did he do that? Was it just because, like, the prong collar hurt him? And I was like in my mind I didn't want to be like him. And I was like in my mind I didn't want to be like, well, yeah, but I was like I mean, yeah, it should be uncomfortable for your dog to like, drag you down the street. Like he's too big to be able to do that, like he's literally going to just like ski you down the street unless we make pulling you a little bit uncomfortable. And as dog trainers we tend to kind of like tiptoe around that of like oh, the e-collar is just used for communication and you know the prong collar it's not like this aversive, but it can be and it should be, because dogs are very physical like. They're not these like soft little babies. If a dog was like doing something rude to another dog, that other dog would correct him by using their teeth. They would bite. So nobody really wants to like make their dog uncomfortable or tell them no ever. And then we have these dogs that are just like bullying their owners all day.

Speaker 1:

I have another dog here for training and he's kind of. He is like oh, I don't even know how to describe this dog. He is so pushy and so bratty. Again, he's a really big dog. He's never had like a regular leash on, he's only had a harness on and the it's a girl and a guy. The guy was really the only one who could like handle the dog because he's just like literally holding him like a suitcase on the harness because he pulls so hard, and this dog would jump all over me. He would drag me down the street like he would go to bite me if he doesn't want to do something.

Speaker 1:

Like if I go to put him in the crate, he like will bite me, right, that's a dog that's never been told no. That dog has never been told no in a meaningful way, and so he's like I can do literally whatever I want. Like I'm going to bully you, I'm going to use my teeth, I'm going to use my body, I'm going to use my force to get whatever I want, and you're never going to be able to tell me what to do. So the tools like e-caller and prong collar allow me to give that dog a meaningful correction in a safe way. Right, in a safe, like non-emotional way. So when that dog goes to put his mouth on me which, like I'm very firm with dogs like you cannot bite me, you cannot put your mouth on me, which, like I'm very firm with dogs like you cannot bite me, you cannot put your mouth on me you would be surprised, like how long people go with like dogs, just like shredding their clothes and like grabbing their arms and I'm like that's not okay. Like this is a big dog, this dog cannot be biting you. I'm gonna correct dog. If your dog puts their mouth on me, like I'm going to correct them, I have to tell that dog like, no, this is not okay, it's not one of those things that's going to solve itself on its own. It's not going to. You know, get better with time or as your dog gets older. That's something that you have to communicate to your dog. No, this is not okay.

Speaker 1:

If your dog was being raised by other dogs, they would communicate that. They would communicate that in a physical way. They would give the dog a physical correction and bite them. So it's our job to tell our dogs what we want them to do. Of course we want to shape behaviors. We want to make training fun, get them working for their food, all that sort of stuff. But just like how I mentioned, you know, crate training. We want that balance. It's the same thing. We have to have the balance.

Speaker 1:

You have to be able to give your dog a meaningful correction and tell them no, your word doesn't mean anything, unless you add something on the back end. What does no actually mean? Is it followed by a correction or is it just an empty threat? If you've never paired no with any sort of correction either, that could simply be moving into the dog. Like just spatial pressure could be a correction to some dogs, but a lot of the dogs that I get do not take those sort of corrections. They're like no, whatever, like that. It doesn't mean anything to me.

Speaker 1:

You have to find a meaningful correction for things that you don't want the dog to do, like jumping up on people. If I have a really big dog that's jumping up on people, like I have to correct that dog for jumping up on people. And I get questions all the time. Meg, my dog does this behavior. How do I stop it? My dog does this. How do I stop it? You have to correct them. It's only fair to tell your dog what you want them to do and what you don't want them to do. We have rules, we have structure. We have consequences to our actions. I always use this analogy. But I would love to drive 100 miles per hour on the highway, but I don't because there's a consequence to that. I'm going to get a fat ticket right. So your dog would love to pull you down the street. There should be a consequence to that, and a meaningful consequence.

Speaker 1:

This doodle that I have right now I can tell he's never had a meaningful consequence. He does whatever he wants whenever he wants. He knows all the things, he knows place, he knows how to walk a heel, but there's never been a consequence for him breaking that. So when he goes to break place I'm going to give him a pop on the prong collar. That's a good enough consequence for him to want to stay on place and guess what? He settles into it, whereas before it was the constant game of oh, she's going to get up, she's going to look away, so now I can go, now's my escape time. So then I have a dog who's just anticipating how to read me, how to wait until I look away. Whereas if I told that dog no, you stay here until I release you and there's going to be a consequence if you break this command before I release you, that dog's going to stay on place and they're going to settle on place, which is the whole point of place.

Speaker 1:

Same thing with the loose lead walk. So many people are like I'm doing the walking drills. My dog understands leash pressure, but they're still willing to pull me down the street when they see another dog. Give that dog a meaningful consequence. There has to be a meaningful consequence after you've taught the dog what you want them to do and they don't do it. There's a consequence for breaking that. If that dog starts putting pressure on the leash, I'm going to give that dog a pop on the leash. Whether using a slip lead or an e-collar, we can give them a tap on the e-collar. You go to put any pressure on the leash, I'm going to give you a tap on the e-collar. Now that's not to say that you know we're doing high level corrections for everything. No, the correction matches the behavior.

Speaker 1:

If I have a dog that's like uh, I had to correct Millie for jumping over the fence and getting out of the yard. You bet I dialed up my e-caller and corrected her for that one. That's not something that I want to have to correct again. Two, you should never escape the yard like. That is just such a big safety hazard for not just you but for other people like I don't need my dog running around the yard, you know. So I dialed up my e-caller to a level that I knew was going to be really uncomfortable for her, because I don't want her ever thinking that that's OK. She goes to climb up the fence, boom, I hit her with the e-caller, she lets out a yelp, she gets down. She has not tried to get out of the yard since. You bet she's thought twice before climbing that fence again.

Speaker 1:

So a lot of dogs know all the things. We've done a really great job of teaching them. We've taught them place, we taught them paw, sit and down and roll over and all of the obedience commands. But we've never told our dog no when they're being bratty, when they're jumping up on us, when they're pulling on the leash. So do not be afraid to give your dog a meaningful no. So many owners are missing out on that piece of the puzzle and it's actually quite simple. Once you've taught your dog a language of either the leash or the e-collar, you can use it, not just, as you know, a gentle communication communication, but you can use it as an aversive and as a consequence and you know dog trainers don't love to talk about that because of course we don't want to be the bad guy, but I'm more than happy to talk about it because it's what I talk about to my owners, you know. So everything that I talk about on here is exactly what I say to my owners, and I'll always be very transparent and like yes, I do correct dogs, I do tell dogs no, and I show my owners how to do so as well.

Speaker 1:

Because, let's face it, so many people are getting so incredibly frustrated with their dogs and they just don't have to be. That frustration is coming from a lack of communication and a lack of boundaries, which gets us into our next one, our next and final, so number five is not setting boundaries with our dogs. What does that look like? So a majority of people don't leave their house without their dog. Their dog pushes up to them for affection, their dog sleeps in the bed with them, the dog eats food off their plate, the dog jumps up on them. Like we just don't have healthy boundaries with our dogs, and I want you to think of like other relationships that you have with other people or family members, like you have healthy boundaries. The success of the relationships that you have revolves around those healthy boundaries.

Speaker 1:

For me, I personally try not to text, you know, clients, like late at night, like past 9 pm. If you're a client and you text me, I'm not going to respond to you. It used to be 5pm, but I felt like that was a little unfair so I was like, all right, we'll push it back to nine, because that's when I go to bed. But having that boundary helps me maintain a healthy relationship with my clients, because if I didn't respect that boundary then what would happen? People would text me late at night because I respond, and then I would get frustrated. I would be like I can't believe these people are texting me so late at night, or at 6 am or 7 am in the morning, like I can't believe these people are texting me so early, like how dare they? Well, that's a boundary that I didn't communicate. So like I'm getting frustrated because I didn't communicate.

Speaker 1:

That boundary and this is what I see a lot with the dogs is like my dog is just like constantly jumping up on the furniture. Or if we like go to somebody's house, they're like running all over their furniture and like walking on the back of the couch like a cat, and I'm like that's insane to me, like you need to set boundaries with your dog, especially like in your own home. For me, everything is permission based. You can get on the couch as long as I let you on the couch and I'll only let you on the couch if you get down when I tell you to get down. If you don't get down off the couch when I tell you to get down, or even worse, you start to resource guard and like bark and growl to keep me away from getting you off the couch. Oh boy, do we have a big issue there. You will never have freedom in the house until you show me that you're not willing to bite me over couch time. Like I'm sorry, but that is a huge relationship issue.

Speaker 1:

I see this a lot with dogs in the bed. Well, I sleep in bed with my dog, but sometimes when I try to get him up, he'll like bite me Insanity, that's just fucking wild to me. I'm sorry, but like if your dog is willing to bite you over, like staying in bed, like y'all got problems, y'all need some boundaries, you need some training and like your dog needs to. I'm sorry, but like respect you, because if your dog is willing to bite you over, like staying in bed, they just don't respect you at all and you need to take away that privilege. Or like if you have a dog who's resource guarding anything like, you just don't get the privilege of having those things until you can listen to me, like, until I can like safely be around you with that thing. Like you don't get to have that thing. I'm sorry, but setting those boundaries with our dogs, especially when we have dogs with behavioral issues, sets the tone for the relationship. Like you cannot have a dog that is willing to mark you over some silly resource.

Speaker 1:

I had recently a dog that was guarding paper towels. It would get a paper towel and it would literally attack the owner if the owner tried to go take the paper towel away. And so then they were like, ok, well, I'm just going to do like the exchange game, which is fine. But then it became okay, the dog goes and gets a paper towel so that you go and get a high value reward. So then the dog is basically demanding this like high value reward by this behavior that you don't like, because you've essentially taught it that, like every time it grabs a paper towel, like she's going to go and get a bully stick, and I really want a bully stick right now. So I'm going to go grab this paper towel. No, give their dog a meaningful consequence when they grab paper towels or like dish towels.

Speaker 1:

The session that I had yesterday where we're e-collar conditioning same thing. You know, the dog was getting so frustrated because we're setting boundaries I'm not allowing you to get up off of place without my permission she lost it. She literally was like spinning like Tasmanian devil, spinning like biting at my hand, biting at the owner's hand, and all we're doing is holding that dog to place with leash pressure. We're not like dragging the dog on place, like we're just preventing the dog from getting off of place. And she got so frustrated by that she was willing to bite us. So the conversation that I had with the owners is like listen, you need to do this all day long. Like this dog needs to practice staying here and doing nothing because this is obviously very hard for her here, and doing nothing because this is obviously very hard for her. And this is a boundary that we need to set, because if we tell her you're not allowed to get up here until I release you, she's going to look to you and listen to you in more ways than that and she's going to think twice before she wants to rip your clothes off or, you know, bite your hands Like one. There has to be a meaningful consequence to you like breaking that boundary, but we need to have the boundaries there in the first place. If you have a dog with behavioral issues, resource guarding, I say no furniture, no time in bed. Create that dog until they start to show you that they can handle those privileges and then we can start to, you know, have those privileges.

Speaker 1:

Another like lack of boundary thing that I see a lot with my owners is never leaving their dog. Now I take my dogs everywhere. I mean I don't want to say everywhere, like I have a lot of dogs here for training right now. So we've kind of been doing a whole lot of nothing with them and that's okay. Life is kind of you know about ebb and flow and I'll take some time off and we'll go whole lot of nothing with them and that's OK. Life is kind of you know about ebb and flow and I'll take some time off and we'll go and do fun things with them. But for now I you know, like I went from taking my dogs everywhere, being on the road trip with them, to like now I don't. My dogs can do both. They can go and hang out in the crate and they can also come with me everywhere.

Speaker 1:

A lot of owners are just taking their dogs everywhere. They never leave them. They won't do anything that doesn't involve their dog. If that's the way that you want to live, great, you're going to have a dog that's like super anxious and super insecure if you're not there. Personally, I don't want my dogs to be anxious and insecure, so I'm going to teach them that, like we can have boundaries, I can take you everywhere some days, but some days you're just going to chill out at the house and I'm not going to give you constant attention. And they're cool with that. My dogs are used to that. They're chill with that. That so many people have dogs that just like literally cannot function if they cannot see their owner and that's simply due to lack of boundaries.

Speaker 1:

Another big thing that I see is dogs laying on owners feet. They'll literally like sit on the top of the couch, like over their owner's head, like wrap themselves around their shoulders, like that is a huge, like red flag because your dog is claiming you. Your dog is saying this is mine, this is my thing, this is my person. I'm guarding them, this is my resource. Your dog should not claim you. Body language is everything If we allow our dogs to sit on our shoulders or like on the back of the couch, which, like it seems so silly that I even have to say this, but it's so common, like so common people will like send me pictures of their dogs just like sitting on their head. I'm like that's so disrespectful, like in dog world, like if a dog did that to another dog and a dog just like laid there and took it like that would. That would be like the most submissive dog ever. That's just like being laid on by another dog. So, yeah, be mindful of that.

Speaker 1:

Don't allow your dog to sit on your feet. Don't allow your dog to constantly lean into you or wrap around you whenever you're walking. That's like a bit of claiming. That's what dogs will do when they're trying to kind of not necessarily always claim but be like hey, I'm in, I'm in charge of you, like I manage you. We don't like that. Don't allow your dog to sit on your feet, especially if you're struggling with behavioral issues, especially if you're struggling with resource guarding or dogs that maybe don't get along with other dogs in the household. There's a bit of a hierarchy issue. The dogs if you have multiple dogs need to look to you for guidance. They don't need to be, you know, claiming you. So, you know, be mindful of those little body language things that we might overlook or think is cute. Oh, my dog is leaning into me all the time, like he loves me. Oh, he always has to come and put a paw on my foot, or he always has to come and, like, sit in front of me and sit on my feet. Yeah, that dog's saying like, this is my person, I make the decisions, I call the shots. She's she's not much of a leader. She doesn't make great decisions.

Speaker 1:

So the the synopsis of this episode of, you know, my long rant of five things you might be doing that are causing you problems is really just like, overall, a lack of boundaries and kind of, you know, changing the way that we live with our dogs and the way that we see our dogs. I want you to be able to see your dogs as dogs. They want to be seen as dogs. They want to be fulfilled as dogs. They don't want to be fulfilled as people. And you know have a million treats and you know stuffed animals and you know all of this like extra stuff, like they want to go outside, they want to roll in the grass. They want to like chase squirrels like they want to be dogs, like let them be dogs but also like set boundaries with them and have structure and have like a healthy relationship. That's really all I want for you and your dog is like. I want you to have a healthy relationship where your dog's not bullying you and you're not getting constantly frustrated with your dog. So hopefully these tips helped you. If you're doing some of them, it's okay. We all are in some way and there's always room for improvement.

Speaker 1:

So, to wrap things up, we're going to do a few little housekeeping things. I am currently in the first week of my virtual shadow program. I am absolutely loving this. It's super cool. Um, one thing that I wanted to do with the virtual shadow program is like keep it very like light and casual. So essentially I've just recorded my training sessions with the dogs that we have For training and we're covering all of the dog training basics currently.

Speaker 1:

So week one is all about like teaching marker words and food, rewards and leash pressure All of the tools that we'll use in our training programs and our curriculum we're covering in this first week and the second week we're going to kind of put it all together into a program. And then the third week we're covering the business side of things. And then the third week we're covering the business side of things. But I don't know. It's just a really cool thing to be able to work so closely with people that really want to take the next step in their like dog training business and their training journey. Like they're just so eager to learn and I love watching their videos, so I have them like submit videos at the end of each day and it's just, it's so great. So I'm going to open that up, probably in the next month or so. Open it up to more students.

Speaker 1:

I kind of told everybody this first round like this is my guinea pig round. Like we're just kind of seeing how things go. So I've done the in-person shadow program back in January. Now we're doing the virtual, and this is something that I definitely want to do more of. We have our dates for our in-person shadow program, so I'll release for our virtual as well. If you're not able to, you know, take a week or two off of work to come and hang out with me. It's okay, I won't take it personally.

Speaker 1:

And then the next thing is our leashes are restocked as of today. So if you're listening to this, it's Friday, april 19th, the day that it came out. Leashes are restocking and they're restocking internationally, which is so freaking cool, super excited about that. If you do try to, if you do want to purchase a leash internationally and shipping is super expensive do not come for me. I did not come up with the prices, that is, shopify's prices, um yeah, but at least you have the option now so, my canadians, you can purchase leashes. I'm so sorry for, like any import tax, like it's, it's so hard to get leashes to you. Let me tell you it's so difficult. But yeah, that's kind of all I have for you. Thanks so much for being here. As always, y'all are the best. Like, this little podcast is the coolest thing ever and I love that y'all are here each week to join me. So we'll see you here next week and, yeah, happy training. Bye.